He Is the Reason I Don’t Trust Men


(Art by Linda Vachon)


I speak on behalf of




Hey, motherfucker.

Yeah, I’m talking to you.

I know what you have done and what you continue to do.  I will expose you to anyone who will listen.

You are the one who beats the woman you claim to love.

You are the verbal/ emotional/ psychological/ spiritual abuser.

You are the sadist, the rapist, the kidnapper, the sex trafficker.

You are the waste of a human life who partakes in female genital mutilation.

You are the sex offender, the predator, the child molester.

You are violent against the minds, bodies and souls of women.

You are the reason I don’t trust men.

You have become so ingrained into the collective consciousness of women that, therein, lies an innate fear, a survival instinct that keeps us looking over our shoulders, questioning the kindness of strangers.

You are the invader, the manipulator who seeks to destroy our sense of self-worth by showcasing violent and over-sexualized images in the media.
You sanctify compliance and crucify defiance.  You teach our sons to desire this.

You seek to weaken us, corrupt us so that we will never feel beautiful or good enough, and we will pass this down as a family heirloom for our daughters to inherit.

You are the reason I don’t trust men.

You have pervaded the lives of women in every corner of the world for far too long now.  You have been let loose and shown no respect, no self-control.

You foolishly believe that violence against the
minds, bodies, souls of women implies that you somehow have conquered, and will forever dominate these territories.

You are the reason I don’t trust men.

You are the one who is convinced that the force to which you operate under is somehow more powerful than the one that drives me.  Herein lies your greatest weakness because you perceive that I, alone, am driven by this force.

You are the reason I don’t trust men.

You are the one who does not understand that these acts of war against women will always cause an uprising, and that the call will be answered from another woman, somewhere in the world.

You are the reason I don’t trust men.

And the words will follow you, echoes driving you into hiding because too many voices will sound the call:
You are the reason I don’t trust men.

(This was originally written in 2012, and is a catalyst for a future project I will be working on.  I hope to collaborate with other female poets and artists about such issues in a self-published book which all the proceeds will be donated to organizations dedicated to ending violence against women.)


12 thoughts on “He Is the Reason I Don’t Trust Men

  1. Wow, this is amazing…..all of it is strong and moving, but this line, in particular, is so incredibly powerful: “You sanctify compliance and crucify defiance.” Yes! That hits right at the heart of it. Such important work you are doing, both speaking out here through your words and also working on other projects that will make a difference in the fight to end violence against women.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. The fear of the beauty and wonder of women has been with us for centuries where some misguided males (often influential) cannot bear the thought that women have the most important and valuable role in life and procreation. Yours is a message that must continue to be spread.


  3. A really powerful piece…sadly some women can also not be trusted…any form of violence or oppression against another should certainly be shouted out and ultimately brought down..


  4. How effectively you use your refrain, increasing in frequency until it is like a hammer at the end! Nothing is harder to overcome than the internalized oppression–as long as we live through the more external onslaught. I think you say it all here. I hope that we someday live beyond sexism and other isms into equality and justice. That would be freedom indeed.


  5. I hate that there are men out there filled with hatred and violence—rapists, murderers, molesters, abusers. There are people you get a sense of this from, for if you don’t know them, they aren’t always keen on showing their true colors. I am so fortunate that the men I am closest too—brother, cousins, uncles, father, husband & son—are the exception to this, the total opposite of this. Very thought-provoking piece. Thanks for sharing.


  6. This is a powerful manifesto. It takes us years to rise up out of that not good enough-ness to claim our full measure of worth. What this poem cries out for so eloquently is for women everywhere to rise up and reclaim their power – we are a force to be reckoned with once we do.


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